supply and demand...

to many people when this term is used it refers to the idea of being able to supply enough of something to someone who is demanding that same thing, hence the term supply and demand. although it is used many times in the field of economics and the relationship between the buyer and the seller, in my eyes it is more applicable in the whole field of life and the relationship between the giver and the taker. it may seem as though these two are intertwined, but in fact they are two different things. in the relationship between the buyer and the seller- there is a two sided exchange where someone is giving something in exchange for something else, but in the relationship between the giver and the taker- there is only a one sided exchange seeing as though someone is giving something to someone who is taking it. in this lies the problem of selfishness where if we are the taker in the relationship then the question must be asked if we are demanding more than the other person can supply. if this happens to be the case- then it will throw the whole supply and demand scale off balance. we as the taker must only demand or request as much as the giver can supply. not only have i found this a problem in everyday life itself, but i have found this a problem in my own. i realize that many times i have played the role of the taker and have demanded more than the other person can supply as the giver. i will admit that even though i sometimes say that i demand very little- in reality i know that i demand more than i should- and this truth is seen through my actions that are exhibited- mainly irrational behavior. these actions can only hurt a man and cause unhappiness between a relationship of any kind- as i have seen these affects myself. i realize now that the idea of selflessness needs to be on the forefront of my mind alot more than it has been. to those that i have wronged- and the list is of many- my deepest apologies. but people do change- and hopefully this particular change will help me from now into the future...

here and there...

Here and there- in life we share,

there are sometimes that come without prepare.

Inevitably so that with the weather comes storms,

then and there will i be for you ever the more.

When life's got you down- seeming as though there is no hope to be found,

i will be there to try and help turn it around.

Even though recently these times have been in great appear,

as much will i be there as i am here.

No matter where you go or what you do,

i will most certainly be there for you.

Whatever happens so matter the light or day,

i will be there for you then as i say this today.

Though the journey gets harder to separate the false from the true,

for me one thing is certain- i will not abandon you.

digging nowhere...

think about it- what is the point of digging a hole? the point is that when you dig a hole you hope to find something down there. whether it be just a worm, oil, or the blue heart of the ocean jewel you are most certainly looking for something. the problem is that if you dig to much- you get too deep- almost deep enough to the point where you are unable to get out of it. this is the point where you have to decide to stop digging and go sell your shovel- so i did. i sold my shovel for some perspective- although i thought about buying a better shovel- digging is too much work anyway and it hurts my very problem prone back. too many a time i dug myself a hole and had to rely on my buddy billy bob joe (name changed for effect) to help me through it. so here i am happily in the unemployment line because i quit my job (aka personality) of constantly digging. digging is pointless in my book- because i found out that i was digging nowhere- and if you are digging nowhere then you certainly wont find anything. although i could really use the blue heart of the ocean jewel right now.

better days ahead...

its amazing how when you can learn look on the bright side- how much better things will seem. tonight has really taught me a lesson in that area. i have been the type of person where if i am not happy with the current situation- then i can just sit and be pissed off about it- and ever since a certain party where i did just that and things didn't turn out so well- i have learned. so i took the bright side theory for a test run tonight- as i kind of expected- things were not the best that they could have been which was no ones fault just the previous happenings of the day- but i decided to look past that and have fun- and in reality i had a blast. so what- things didn't turn out how i planned which again was no ones fault- but i realized that if i decided to be pissed off about it- it would just have made things worse. so in a sense i am very glad that i looked on the bright side because i accomplished just what i wanted to happen tonight- to spend some time with a certain special someone- and i hope they agree. but despite of the events that happened or maybe even because of them- i had fun tonight and would not change a single thing. most importantly- i know that there will be better days ahead- there always are- and thats what i look forward to...